Tell Me Ya Burger

Steve Westmeyer-Hoagie roll, unknown beef-like substance, 'merican cheese-food, french fries lettuce, tomato, ketchup, mayonnaise, wrapped in brown paper bag. AKA the Fat Cat. 1,600 or so calories.

Eric Market(Post No Bills) - I'd have to combine the Triumph burger and buffalo burger from the Seargentsville Inn. 1/2 lb buffalo patty med rare, toasted Kaiser Roll with lettuce, tomato, deli mustard and Triumphs Cajun mayo. Maybe some apple wood smoked bacon and of course some sharp cheddar. Dill pickle on the side and a big 'ol side of fries with mayo for dipping.

Fredrick Ree(The Turnbucklers)-I like smaller reg. size beef patties doubled up, maybe some Swiss, a lil’ BBQ sauz, those lil’ crispy onion things, lettuce n tomato, toasted bun...boosh...I don’t enjoy furburgers

Dave Slagle(Somerville Town Drunks)- I love burgers.  Especially my BBQ Pulled Pork Cheeseburger: It has two burgers with cheddar cheese, pulled pork and coleslawr in the middle. Topped with bread and butter pickle slices, ketchup, mustard, and of course, love. Toasted bun too

Brian Woolverton(Post No Bills)-  The Post No pork roll, egg and cheeseburger. Hard roll (toasted) with pork roll, egg, cheddar cheese, fried onions, ketchup and hot sauce.

Mike Delin AKA Mookie- Hamburger on a pretzel roll with baby Swiss, pork roll, fried egg, onion ring, mayo and ketchup.  "Fat Mookie."

E Chops(Somerville Town Drunks)- The Palabra Patty Melt:  2 pieces of bread, two slices of cheese- 1 American, 1cheddar, beef patty, pickle chips and BBQ sauce.  Make a grilled cheese with a burger in between.

Scruff (The Tea and Whiskey)- The Locomotive at Burger Express in Carteret: Near as i can tell it's just a standard double quarter-pounder with regular beef patties, American cheese, ketchup and pickles on a hard roll.  Nothing extraordinary about it based on what I know of the ingredients, but when you actually bite into it that shit, it’s magical.

Bobby Cenicola(Somerville Town Drunks)- It all starts out with an Italian meatball made into a patty.  Marinarar sauce on the meat, topped with melted fresh mozzerellar, roasted peppers and grated parmigiana cheese on garlic bread, round roll….”The Digitialian Burger”

Issue #4 Love/Hate List

There’s a thin line between love and hate but these things fall way to the left or right of that line.

LOVE

1. McDonald’s- You want some nuggets?

Yeah.  Double cheeseburger?   Double Yeah. 

Fries and a shake?  Hell Yeah!  Tasty, cheap

and it makes me shit within 15 mins. of eating. 

Win, win, and win.  And hey, let’s bring back

the McRib while we’re at it.

2. Meat and candy- One of life’s simple

pleasures is a steak for supper and a bag

of Sour Patch Kids for dessert.  Who needs

food groups or a pyramid when all you need

is meat and candy.

3. Hot Sauce- Ever see the movie Undercover

Brother when Eddie Griffin has that hot sauce

watch-I want that shit.  I put hot sauce on almost

everything and I think you should too.

Hate

1. McDonald’s Commercial’s- I may love it,

but McDonald’s doesn’t make high quality,

4 star food.  Why try to get all fancy and

complicated by acting like you’re a coffee

shop or salad center.  I got one word for

their commercials-Horrible’

2. Vegetables- They may be good for you.  They

may provide vitamins and nutrients.  They may

even be essential to your diet.  But, do they taste

good?  No!  If they did would you have to force

kids to eat them.  Exactly.

3. Cold ketchup- Why put cold ketchup on hot food. 

I just don’t get it..