Saturday, February 5, 2011

Issue #5 Albums I Love 2010

Unlike previous years when I’ve had top 10’s and even 20’s this year there’s only five. That’s not meant to imply that said five albums are just the best of a year that’s short on great music. They would all be on any top list I made regardless of when they were released. My top five albums of 2010 go as follows:
The Obvious – Bringing Wreck – This was without a doubt the most highly anticipated for me. I had first seen this band about a year prior and been entranced by the combination of their sound, energy, enthusiasm and talent ever since. Sadly I had nothing to own and listen to whenever I felt like it with the exception of having “K.O.? O.K.!” (which continues to be my favorite track) on the pop out player of my myspace profile. Take everything you love about 90’s grunge (especially the female fronted bands) and mix it with everything you love about whatever you’d classify a group like Yeah Yeah Yeahs as, and you have a pretty good idea where this band is coming from. It’s only a five song EP, so making it flawless is a little easier than it is with a full length. But considering I love everything else I’ve heard from this group’s live sets I don’t doubt that they’re capable of releasing just as perfect an entire album.
Black Wine – Black Wine – Continuing with the awesome resurgence of the 90’s alt/grunge sound most of us grew up on, but still making it their own and not coming off as some sort of retro gimmick is Black Wine with their self-titled release. Comprised of the former rhythm section of Hunchback and Jeff Schroeck formerly of The Ergs it’s no wonder this is incredible. While the members are all capable of all sorts of intricate musicianship their guitar/bass/drum acrobatics and feedback squeals never come at a cost of keeping the melody intact. My personal favorite track would have to be “Chateau Of Ghosts”.
Screaming Females – Castle Talk – Much like their previous release this album took longer to grow on me than their first two. The great songs are all there, but the downside of our fellow New Jerseyan’s meteoric rise to national prominence is that they’re always on the road and we’re not hearing the songs in the basements of New Brunswick or the local venues we love prior to their release. We had grown accustomed to seeing the songs played live for months before actually owning them to listen to at our convenience. Sadly now we have to wait for the album to drop like the rest of the country. And when the tour comes “home” it’s way the hell up in Hoboken. Songs like “I Don’t Mind It” and my personal favorite “Sheep” however make the wait feel worth it.
Gogol Bordello – Trans-Continental Hustle – Odds are you already know who this band is/what they’re about and already have your good, bad or indifferent feelings about them. Personally I love them. This was the most pleasant surprise of the year to me in that it was promoted very little prior to its release. I had literally gone to the store to purchase the next album on the list as part of my wife’s birthday present and right by it in the new releases section was this. Since becoming an ipod owner it’s rare that my car cd player sees much use anymore, but I had to open and put this in immediately on my drive home. This album is easily the equal if not the superior of their previous release. Also on the off chance you need to still be further sold on this it was produced by Rick Ruben.
Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings – I Learned The Hard Way – Whether it was released this past year or had it come from soul’s inception in the 60’s/70’s this would still be one of the finest offerings the genre had to offer. Musically this is one of the tightest and most impressive ensembles you could ask for. Combine that with the relatable lyrical content and urgency of delivery from the voice of Sharon Jones, and it is an unstoppable force.

Issue #5 Love/Hate list

Love:
1) The Court Tavern- It smells like piss
 and looks like shit, but where else can
 you get a High Life tall boy, see a great
show, and get a Fat Cat on the way home?
 Nowhere, that’s where.  The best bar in NJ.
2) The Asbury Lanes- Good sound, PBR on
 tap, tons of room and dope art work in the
 bar.  A great place to see shows and they
 treat bands good too.
3) Dive Bars- I like a bar where you don’t
really want tap beer because you know the
 mugs and taps haven’t been cleaned in a
decade. Dive bars normally smell like beer
from 1985, but they also are usually cheap,
un-crowded, and have a jukebox that hasn’t
been updated since your Dad hung out there.
Hate:
1) Going to court- The hours are boring,
 the days are long and it almost always
 costs you money.  Whether you’re a witness,
plaintiff, juror, or Defendant, court is lame.
2) Bowling- People are always like “Let’s get
 drunk and bowl” and I’m always all “Let’s get
 drunk and NOT bowl.”  Hey, ya wanna play with
 big, heavy balls invite me over on a Friday night.
 I’ll even shave so there smooth and shiny.
3) “Fancy” bars- I hate when a bar opens and
decides it’s gonna be all fancy be having weird
bar stools, expensive drinks & not showing
 sports on the TV.  If I wanted a night of drinking
 to cost a small fortune I would have gone to the titty
 bar.  Bars are for drinking. Not flashing your social
 standing.

Year in Sports

Downhill hottie Lindsey Vonn captured gold in Vancouver (along with my heart), while the Flying Tomato and party animal Bode Miller also did their country proud by winning gold…Drew Brees and the Saints finally gave New Orleans something to cheer about winning the first Super Bowl in franchise history in what was another tough year for the city.  WHO DAT?...   And although Reggie Bush did win a ring, he did lose his Heisman Trophy and Kim Kardashian…  The Celtics won the east beating the Cleveland Cavaliers but went on to lose in the Finals to the Los Angeles Lakers, giving Phil Jackson more rings then fingers…   The World Cup happened in South Africa this year and Americans pretended to care up until Ghana beat us (Spain won)…  The San Francisco Giants won their first World Series since moving from NY this year, ending a 56 year drought.  They did it behind the weed smoking of ace pitcher Tim Lincecum…  Some other stuff happened in Hockey and Tennis but who really cares right?...  Floyd Mayweather Jr. looked scared to fight Manny Pacquiao and still does.  Floyd did however steal his girlfriends IPHONE in an attempt to look tough though…Free agent Lebron James signed with the Miami Heat and took tons of shit over his decision.  Personally I could care less what uniform he’s in to dunk over people.  Let the haters hate King…  Over all, A pretty good year in sports (unless you’re a Cubs fan) and I’m looking forward to a good 2011. Go Athletics.

Issue #5- Movie of the Year



I’ll give you 3 good reasons why Machete was the movie of the year.
1.       Jessica Alba naked in the shower.  Now you don’t get any full frontal, but there’s a ton of side boob and shiny skin.  I mean, if she can make Good Luck Chuck and Into the Blue watchable she can make this movie great.
2.       Lindsey Lohan bare chested.  Okay, her tits are mostly covered by her hair, but I swear I saw some nipple in there.
3.       Danny Trejo as the star.  He’s got jailhouse tattoos and scarred up face but he also finally got a leading role and he was fucking awesome in it.
Need some more reasons to see it, well, how about the director Robert Rodriguez.  He’s a great director and this is his best movie yet.  Or how about the cast.  Besides Alba and Lohan, there’s also the lawnmower man Jeff Fahey, Cheech Marin, Steven Seagal (and his terrible Spanish ascent), Don Johnson, a superhot Michelle Rodriguez, and Bobby De Niro.  If that’s not enough, there’s also blood and guts, drinking and drugging, and tits and ass.  Plus, the movies pretty funny too (especially the “Machete doesn’t text” line).  I feel a lot of people slept on this movie in the theatre.  Don’t sleep on the DVD.  You heard it here.  Movie of the year.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Issue #5- OUT NOW




Pick it up here:
The Court Tavern (New Brunswick)
Curmudgeon Music (Somerville)
Calabrese's Barber Shop (Keyport)
Choppers Barber Shop (Flemington)
Immortal Ink (Flemington)
Immortal Ink (Clinton)
Bluestockings Books (NYC)

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Sexy drunks

Bert respectfully thought this was La Palabra material.  I agreed.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Un-used back cover

Every issue there's a bunch of pictures I want to use for the back cover.  This is one that actually was printed, titled, and taped before I decieded to go with another picture.  It's just too good to not be seen.  Enjoy.